i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize