I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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