At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
