Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
