please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
