I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Randomize
