i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Randomize
