Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Randomize
