party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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