Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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