So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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