It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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