Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
