is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize