Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
