I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
