I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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