oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
