Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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