I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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