I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
cat food counts as protein by the way
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
