Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize