Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
