this beer tastes like vomit already
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
