Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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