I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Your penis caused this!
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
