these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
