Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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