soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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