Pants 0. Shit 1.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I am mentally ready for anal.
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