so that wasnt chicken after all
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
