That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
