drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize