I hate all girls vehemently.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
