I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Randomize
