Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
