i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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