I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
