I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
