try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
