I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
We are all done wearing pants today
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
