you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
