She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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