somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize