I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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