I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
There are leaves in my underwear?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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