you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
