I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
You're like the curious george of whores
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
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