Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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