I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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